things did not turn out the way we always wanted..how we expected it to be..everyone is tired of gossip..who is not? i am reali tired of it..i hate all this..wen a person is angry they tend to accuse whoever they tot e person was..okay not everyone..but i belong to that kind of gal..i am saying sorry right now becuase i know i am in e wrong partically..i am stubborn..you shd how stubborn i can get..yeah stubborn may means tt it is an excuse..but it is jus me..i am sorry..i have done wad i can if you are still angry than let it be..because there is nothing i can do.
things are not going well for me..i am like having terrible mood swings..dun feel like talking..i kept on flaring up at qiu ying..sorry gal..i mean it!! it is not out to irritate you alright..i must sae i have a group of ppl tt stand by me..tt include bel..i am gald i have bel..she is jus beyond words..am i trying too hard? tt explains why i am so tired? shd i let it loose? a sense of secure is wad i am looking for? is there such a feeling? i am totally drain out..i wonder who understand how exactly i feel..things are getting out of control..smiles are jus smiles..no more anger..no more hatred..jus plain down..
never hear me mentioning all this? it is because i dunno how to say it..gimme some time and i will tell all of you..jus gimme time..why am i typing all this? haven't i told you all rainy days are depressing days..i hate rainy days..i hope weekends will be much longer..dun wan to go sch or anywhere..jus wan to be alone..maybe not alone..wish you are here wid me? impossible..tt y i dun dare to wish or expect anything..scared of disappointments..i cant take disappointments well..i reali ope i can be like someone who have no expectations or hopes...withouts this disappointments would not exist..
this a is pretty long entry..maybe because i am in one of my depressing mood so i tend to write more..things had been reali bad for one of my fren too..but i know she is happie now..after everything is solve..happie for you..okay..i went out wid qiu stella and jay..funnie ppl..esp qiu..she is a pretty special and weird gal..all her hokkien words and her ability to puke is rather amusing to all of us..it was a pity chuan was not able to join us..at least we bought a bag to cheer me up!! cant wait for monday!! we are going to catch a movie together for the first time..i bet it is going to be fun..
not because qiu is going!! it is because ALL of us are going..thanks for being there for me even thou i din say much..true frens stand strong even misunderstandings come along..
(7/16/2005 11:41:00 AM)
